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Do men struggle with friendship?

Darryl Rosen • Aug 17, 2022

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Do men struggle with friendship?

Why do so many men have no real friends?

Was the title of an article I read the other day. Uplifting right?

The author was choosing a best man for his wedding when he realized he had nobody to ask.  

A 2019 youguv survey found that one in five men have no close friends — twice the proportion for women. 

A similar poll by the Movember Foundation put it at one man in three — and when “close” was defined as someone they could talk to about health or money worries, that rose to one in two. 

So - Do men struggle with friendship?

Per the article: “As a general rule, most male friendships are side by side: it’s shared activities, we do stuff together. Women bond face to face, it’s based around talk and emotional disclosure.”

If men lose the shared activities, or the habitat where they take place — work, a hobby, whatever — the friendships go too.  

This is what happened to my Dad.

His dementia has made friendship difficult but when I think about it, he used to know everybody and exactly nobody at the same time.

Even when he retired - he suffered

I don’t want to end up that way.

The guy in the article eventually found the best man for his wedding.

Here’s his advice.

“Show up when you’re asked. Go first when you’re not asked. And keep going, even when it’s hard.” 

Make the effort. 

Be with your male friends differently. Be more present, check in more often even when it’s not convenient

For me - In case Jill knows something I don’t know, I won’t need a best man for another wedding anytime soon, but this is still good to know.

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